too many cooks in the kitchen...

well, sometimes. But I'll tell you what. Having a LOT of cooks in my home has been a MAJOR blessing!

When all my girls were younger they LOVED to cook with me. I would head into the kitchen to prepare some sort of snack meal or dessert, and instantly I had four sets of beautiful eyes sparkling my way. They climbed on counters, scoot chairs over for themselves and a sister and stood motionless ready for instruction. They were ready to help prepare food in an instant.  Of COURSE I wanted to share that time with them! Of COURSE I wanted to make memories sharing family recipes and some of my very own! Of COURSE I knew the importance of teaching my children to work in a kitchen and the importance of food. How it sustains our life. How delicious and fun it can be! How it can literally bring joy! And also how to be smart and safe about what we feed our precious bodies.  However, its not as glamorous as it looks on Pinterest with clean white counter tops and a small child sitting still and pleasant on said countertop with a silver bag of non GMO milk chocolate chips. Not a tear in an eye. Not a sprinkle of flour on their clothes. Not even an egg shell (or entire egg) spilled across the floor.  No, no. Reality is NOT Pinterest.

MY reality: ALL my girls wanted to put ALL the fun ingredients in the Kitchen aid for cookie batter. ALL of my girls wanted to stir the bowl when making pancakes. ALL of them wanted to cut, peel or mash anything we were making every time we prepared food. All of them had slimy goopy messy hands at the same! I would play the 'who can stay frozen until mama comes to get you" game while taking one child at a time to the countertop each them up. I would talk to my children like a puppy saying "staaaaaaaaay" while I wiped up the food off the floor that had been spilled. I would divide the ingredients up into little dishes (pre measured) so they each got to pour something into the mix.  It was mass hysteria. I wanted to cry EVERY single time we cooked or baked. And I DID cry a lot of the times. I wanted to scream and I wanted to stop. There was always a huge mess during and after. There were always messy hands and frustrated sisters. There were ALWAYS SO MANY DARLING LITTLE HANDS!

I had to get a grip. I had to figure something out! I had to think of something fast so these precious babes I have been trusted with would learn and grow and enjoy our time in the kitchen. So, I made a cooking day for them all. Monday was for {S}. She got to help me with all the things! We spent time talking. I taught how to use certain utensils and tools. She learned to cut and she learned to read the recipes. She got to learn how wonderful it can be in the kitchen creating. The got to have quiet calm pleasant time with her mother (and I with my daughter) without any frustrations. They ALL got that! Tuesday was for {E}. Wednesday was for {D} and Thursday was for {L}. And Friday was for pizza! Saturday and Sunday I got to cook alone (my therapy).

You guys! It was AWESOME! We did this for a year or two and then the magic happened. Little by little I would let them take over the entire meal for the night. I stood back and talked them through certain things. They excelled like I never would have known! They got to learn what they liked and what they didn't! One loves to bake! One loves to crack the eggs the very most! One loves to cook more than bake. One loves to eat and sample while she goes and one loves to clean while she goes. It was GENIOUS!!! The peace that filled my home was priceless. The lessons learned and time spent was priceless.

It has also brought so much relief when Mama has to be somewhere right at dinner time. I can assign a daughter to prepare a meal and it gets done! It has been therapy (like for myself) for a few of them. It has been a stress reliever and peace bringer. It has helped them learn service for others and it has taught them about health. It was a TON of work and I had to bring my most patience BUT! It has been one of the GREATEST rewards!!! The memories are there. The awful ones from days before which now I can almost laugh about ;) And the lovely ones from our special times together. I will complexity cherish that time with my daughters.

If you are struggling with cooking in your home, give this a try! Give your children a special day with you in the kitchen. Have them even choose the meal they will prepare. Hey, why don't ya even let them shop for the ingredients with you! Give them a small portion of that hefty shopping list and get them feeling important!

While potty training has and always will be my LEAST favorite part of parenting, teaching my children to cook is ranked up there with my MOST favorite parts.









xo-teresa

Looking through old family photos should be a no-no when you are pms-ing. For reals! As I was searching through the 24,000 photos on my phone this morning (yes thats right...I have much too many), my heart began to ache. Oh my darling little ones. Why did you have to grow up?

I have loved being a mother. Even on the rough days. Except for during the potty training days. Thats when I loved being a mother but also wished we were animals that lived outside. ;) But those don't last too long. I have loved watching each of my children grow and learn and become such cool humans! Every chapter, every paragraph has taught me something about this glorious life (and super unglamorous sometimes) that I wouldn't have learned without them. No college degree, no profession could teach me the things I learned.

The goal has always been to raise my children to one day be capable adults. So here I am. With amazing growing children. One about to become an adult. We have almost made it! And I sit this morning with heartache, missing my little ones. Missing the simpleness of our lives. Missing their tiny chunky hands and arms wrapped around me. Missing their wide eyes listening to my voice as I sing them to sleep. Missing the cuddles. Them climbing on my lap so I can rock them in my chair, while I dream of what you will become. Ooooh darlings. I sure loved those days. and I miss them.

So, how on earth can I get through this day without crying about it?! Well, nowadays, those little bright eyes have become bigger bright eyes, waiting to tell ME all about their days. Those simple days are FILLED with chatter about boys and things they are learning. We are busy running around watching them grow and become those beautiful humans I dreamed about. I am their assistant in this life. Guiding them, teaching them and listening to them. And they might not be as little as they once were, but they still snuggle next to mama and let me rock them and sing with them and embrace the glorious humans they are.  So THAT is what I will remember when I ache for those times. I will stay right in the moment knowing that this life is a gift! Each moment of it! And one day I will long for the days I am in right now.

xo-teresa

setting goals

I finished a book the other day. A friend recommended it to me. Girl, Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis. I loved it. I loved it so much. While reading it I felt important. I felt motivated. I felt like I wasn't alone in the feelings and thoughts I have. And as per normal, I didn't relate to all of the topics she shared at this moment in my life, but some were spot on! Some were spot on for Teresa circa 1998. Some were Teresa circa 2007. Some of the topics are Teresa right this minute!

One of her topics about setting goals had my bestie thinking...which then got me thinking. The bestie said something to the effect of, "Dude! We are total losers! We don't have any goals!" jk. She didn't say it like that ;) But, what she did say was that we NEED goals. My rebuttal to that was, "Oh honey, we have LOTS of goals!" I started thinking of the goals and listing them. Getting children to bed on time. Getting family to church on time. Planning next activity for the youth in our ward. Washing and folding all of the laundry. Attending the temple once a week. As I listed and she listened, we realized all of our goals are mommy goals or calling goals. Some of our other pals chimed in as well and mentioned their goals. Making sure our children stayed alive each day was one of the responses...which is actually real life. Ask anyone.

As we kept thinking, we realized its so important to make goals as a mother, but we need to make goals for ourselves. This includes goals for our marriages. As a mother, we know how easy it is to be sucked into the Mommy Zone. Hey lemme just stop right there and say some of us LOOOOOVE the Mommy Zone! I can get lost in it for months, completely saturated in the work of my family  and be perfectly happy!! BUT, there will come the time when in some way or another we realize what has happened to us and we say, "Pump the brakes! I need a breather."

So, we decided to make some personal goals. Bestie said she wanted to make sure she had gum in her purse. So she did it. GOAL!  Start blogging again. GOAL! Running everyday was another goal. Not punching a wall when we get frustrated. Making dinner in the croc pot on tennis match days.  Read a book you love...the actual book, not audible, Teresa. ;) Make a certain time for just you and your spouse each day/night. These are great goals!

As I hit the ground running with these goals I feel better about myself already. I haven't made any long term goals quite yet, mine are for the next month. But, its start. And thats what I'd like to motivate you today with!

Start small.
A goal is a goal no matter the size. Tell yourself you want to accomplish SOMETHING. If you want a goal of traveling the world thats great! Write it down!  But if you haven't made and reached a goal for awhile you might want to pick something that will encourage you and not set you back. Seriously. I want so badly to travel to Jerusalem. Scotland. Iceland. Thailand. And more! But, if I get too far ahead of myself it will discourage me. Maybe you don't work that way... so have at it! London bound you are! But, I know I should start with something I KNOW I can achieve in the near future so I can feel pumped and believe in myself! Also...children. My big goals of traveling really do revolve around school schedules and budgets. Sharing my money with the minions is real life. ;)

Make a list.
Organize and prioritize your goals. See which ones you really want to get done. Ask yourself what their benefits are to your life. Which ones are attainable in the near future and which ones will take more time.

Achieve them!
Get moving! Nothing is stopping you from reaching your goals! Set your mind to it and go!! And don't forget to enjoy the ride!



xo- teresa

Hi. my name is mom...

Ooooooooh my goodness! Its been almost three years since I have blogged and I want back! I have found myself with a new motivation and a new name! I have a lot to say on a daily basis and have missed having an outlet...except my best friends ears! (poor girl) So, here I am. Ready to go at it again! Hopefully as I blog, I can share my experiences with you and you can share yours with me! If you find this blog uplifting or positive in anyway, please share!

xo-teresa

a parents report card...

Oh man. Have you ever thought about this? I mean, maybe looking at parenting in a different way than we usually do? Like what if we were graded? What if we had an instructor or teacher grading us on they way we are parenting. What would be our report card? What would our marks say about us? Don't we truly ALL feel like we are messing up in SOME way or another? And just when we think we are about to Ace a test we bomb it? Even after we have studied and worked hard and paid attention to the important things?

Well, through the years I have received some report cards and progress reports of my own. A screaming child in line at the grocery store. A daughter running to the kitchen with a hand print on her back from another daughter hitting her. A messy house. My own messy hair..because we all now a messy hair day must mean we don't have all our ducks in a row right? ;) (hahaha) What about a daughter who has comforted a hurt friend, or a daughter who shared her snacks or a daughter who told the truth. Sometimes I receive a child with a Honor roll certificate or a great piano recital or a child with a trophy from her dance completion! Those are the GOOD report cards!

 Thankfully, when I get the not so great progress reports I have been taught to LOOK at my mistakes and keep trying for that A at the end of the term. Sometimes I DO get that A. Sometimes I work SO hard and my marks are less than I expect. Sometimes I mess up royally and have to re take the entire course. Like today, when I got upset at one daughter for spilling her cereal bowl in the car today. Yeah. I'll re read that chapter. I have passed that test before!! I really have! But, this morning was different. Different emotions and thoughts in my mind and different needs for the day resulted in a different reaction than when I took the test last week :/

And I think thats what makes us feel like we've failed. Because we KNOW what we are capable of. We know we have done better. We know the kind of parent we want to be and the kind of parent we ARE. So when we don't do things just the way we hope we always do, we feel like we are a wreck. We feel like our kids won't ever forgive us. We feel like we have taken 8 steps back. Thats exactly how I felt today. Like I had been such an amazing mama and then boom. Over spilled cereal.

I have to talk myself down to earth.  I have to tell myself and my kids that I AM a great mom. I have to tell them hey listen! I make mistakes, too! Sometimes I need to be I sorry for my actions and I have to try harder. We all do. And I guess that in its self should make me feel like I didn't fail. Because now I get to teach them to forgive others and ALSO forgive themselves, right?  UUUUUUGH. Being a parent is ROUGH! Best job ever and would never trade it, but when you really care you notice how tough it really is.

I know I am trying my hardest everyday to take care of my children and help them learn and grow. I know I am doing my best to keep them happy. But I also know that a happy well taught and well rounded child doesn't mean the child is always smiling and laughing and running around with balloons in their hands. Sometimes a child will be let down or grounded or disciplined for their behavior. But in the long run that child is the happiest...right?

So, this morning I might have failed. But maybe I can retake the test. Maybe when they come home and I teach them to clean the car seats properly after a mess, and teach them to forgive when I apologize  and then show them we can move on...maybe they will learn a great lesson. And then maybe I'll get that A. Or a B. I'm okay with B today, too ;)

top ten reasons I love being a mom..

1. Smooches.

Lets start off this list with this because, dude. You all know the daily amount of smooches we get from our babes is pretty much the main thing that keeps us going on this roller coaster! Who does't melt when their child plants on them?! 

2. Newborn snuggles.
Going right along with number 1, snuggles...from your newborn. Oh the delicious smell of a fresh new baby, bathed and lathered in baby magic lotion. Holding your child close to your chest and feeling their warm skin. (my uterus is screaming right now) It's. Magic.

3. Birthdays.
Oh dear me. How I love a birthday!! I love birthdays for my children, I love birthdays for you, I love birthdays for me, I  love birthdays for everyone!! I LOVE celebrate each one of my children lives! We re-tell each girls birthday story on their birthday so they can remember how important that day is. I love the individual celebration if each girl. The wonderful things they bring to our family and to the Earth. Oh and please don't forget how delicious birthday cake is! Yeah. Birthday cake should have its own number on this list ;)

4. An excuse to leave any terrible situation.
Oh me oh my. There have been PLENTY of times when I find myself in situation I wish I could run from. Plenty. And the, "I gotta go, she needs to lay down," or "Ew. She smells stinky. I better go change her," or the "I need to get my little one from school right quick," excuse has helped ...a lot.

5. Holidays.

These can be UBER expensive having children BUT the price we pay is ALWAYS worth the adorable dresseded up scarecrow or cowboy or bunny rabbit on Halloween. And the wish lists go on and on but on Christmas morning those glittery eyes that are surprised with all the Christmas wishes and dreams  make us do it again...year after year. And the yummy valentine candies we buy for them...and grab an extra for us...worth it. And teaching our babes why we celebrate The 4th of July, Thanksgiving and Martin Luther King Jr. day make Holidays one of THE greatest things about being a parent.

6. Acceptance.
If you have never felt accepted before, taken for exactly who you are, you are in for a huge surprise when you hold a new baby. They don't care about ANYTHING except love. Aaaaand a few gallons of milk. And some sleep, too. They don't care about what you did, what you say, how you think or what you wear. They're just hoping for a little love and prooobably praying that you won't drop them...which takes me to number 7...

Trust. These humans trust us adults with everything they have. They trust what we say. They trust what we feed them. They trust us while we drive, they trust us with their clothing. They trust that we are not feeding them poison and sending them to school in a swimsuit in the middle of winter. They get in a car, buckle up and look out the windows dreaming of the places they'll go, what a cow says and what their next meal will be. They just TRUST us. And that trust brings a GREAT feeling for us.  A reward that can't be bought...only earned.

8. Purpose.
Somedays I want to sleep in until 9 am. Lie. I'm lying. EVERY day I want to sleep in until 9 am.  I just LOVE my bed, okay?! ;)
And on the rough days when I have gone through a death, a loss, or the very most stressful day, I just want to curl in a ball and sulk. But, I have little ones that need me. So, I get out of my slump. I get dressed (kinda), put on a bra, brush my teeth and move through. These babies give purpose to push through the rough times. They bring smiles and sunshine. They bring other things to the table, too, like fighting and sassing etc but this is a POSITIVE post today...so wrapping those little arms around their mamas/daddys  neck on an off day really does make things better.

9.Future grand babies
EVERY grandparent I have talked to says being a grandparent is ALMOST better than being a parent! For many reasons but a few are because hello! you get to have those newborn snuggles you have missed so much over the years!! You get the love and adoration and trust ALL over agin!! BUT without the stress of making sure they are perfectly dressed and fed and off to school and church and friends houses everyday! You don't have to wake up through the night to change them and feed them!! You don't have to buy the necessary feminine hygiene products for them and you DONT have to deal both the sass and frustrations of PUBERTY!! Wooohooo! I plan to be an attentive hands on grandparent, an extension of a parent to my grand children, so long as my daughters want that. So, I will be helping encourage the standards and beliefs my children teach their children. BUT, I won't have the major stress and worry that their own parents will have. If I raise my children well and if they choose, they will hopefully take lessons learned in their home growing up and my husband and I can't trust THEM to raise their children well. MAN! I'm excited for grand babies!


And number 10.

10. Love.
The perfect, honest, pure, unconditional love a child brings to your life, is the number one reason I will NEVER regret being a parent and ALWAYS be grateful for. There is NO love like the love given to you from your own special child that you watch grow everyday. That you teach. That you pour your heart and soul into. That you sacrifice for. That you worry about and think about throughout each day. Sharing your life and making memories and watching little humans grow gives such a sense of pride and happiness. The dance recitals, trips to the beach, vacations in the mountains and days spent at Disneyland are all part of this wonderful journey as a parent. We do these things because of love. The love we GIVE and the love received. Love is the reason, folks. Love will always be the reason and love will always be the answer.

the sayings of a mama...

Between my mama and myself I have collected quite a few "sayings" I use with raising my children. Wanna know what they are...okay, sure!

I love you for goodie.
You're my favorite (insert childs name here) in the whole world.
Go the extra mile.
Do unto others.
Beautiful in your heart is the best kind of beautiful.
Kindness begins with...me.
Remember who you are.
Stick together.
Sharing is caring.
Be your own kind of beautiful.

The lazy man works twice.
Birds of a feather flock together.
I am raising capable adults.
Go look it up.
There is always something to be done.

Let me know what your fave is!

 xoxox