engaged in intentional parenting...

I watched the LDS General Conference this weekend and a few different things stuck out to me that I wanted to share and chat about.

Ask yourself, are you parenting with thought and reason? Do you THINK about the things you are about to say to your children before you say them? Do you try to understand the reasons your children do the things they do? Are you engaged in parenting your children...and do you do you have the best of intentions for THEM?

 This subject is probably one of my VERY favorites I listened to. Engaging in intentional parenting.  I take parenting pretty serious. Maybe too serious sometimes. When I was handed each of my children I knew I wanted to do my best. I wanted to be more than just in their lives. I wanted to be a source of security and safety for them. I wanted to give these beautiful angels EVERY chance possible to succeed in this life. In MY opinion, to succeed means SO many things. I want my children to be kind. To know who they are. To know where they come from. I want them to be smart. Have  great education. Thoughtful. Unselfish. I want them to find love and be loved and be loving. I want them to be strong and gentle. I want them to have manners and respect. If they had these things, I would think it was successful. Along with a few others things. 

 I knew it was mostly MY responsibility to help them learn these things. So began my intentional parenting. Most choices I made, I did intentionally.  I would need to be a good example to them. I would need to watch the things I do and say and the way I behave. If I want my children to be respectful...then I need to show them respect. I don't believe that just because I am their mother  I GET respect from them. I have to earn it. And I need to give it. If I didn't want my children to speak a certain way, then I couldn't either. If I wanted them to be amazing readers, I would need to encourage reading and read myself. You, get the point.

I want my children to KNOW who they are. That they belong somewhere. That they are part of something so large and important. That they, as an individual, are SO important. That they are never overlooked. I want them to have a relationship with God. I want them to know they are loved and cared for. I knew I would need to teach them and be the example. It would need to be an intentional decision to teach them daily about this.  I LOVE when my children walk in on me when I am praying. They see how important it is. And I love even more when I walk I on their prayer time. 

Not only do I find these things important but PLAYING with our babies is so important! So spending my extra time with them is HUGE! The are my most favorite people! Fishing and swimming and reading and saying and chalking drawing and shopping and traveling are all thins that help us get to know each other and make memories. But, spending that time with each other opens time for us to talk. To teach and share with each other the things that are important. 

I have said it a MILLION times, parenting four daughters is rough...because of the chat time! However, I have also said it is one of the greatest things about them, too. This chat time is when we talk about anything and everything. 

Being engaged in our children lives will bring us closer as a family. I truly feel that if parents engage in parenting EACH child they have, and EACH day, those children will grow to be confident, happy and secure. Which then leads to success. And if each parent engages in parenting, they will feel a sense of happiness and pride in themselves. I feel so much better about myself when I spend time with my children. When they have amount of attention they need, there is less reason for them to act out in negative ways.  I feel like it is THE BEST thing for everyone involved.

So, my goal this week is to make sure I am making the time with my darlings matter. I will make sure they know they are loved and important and have wonderful qualities about them. I want to play with them more...maybe I will bring out some boards games this week! And a new box of side walk chalk NEVER hurts! And if it rains, like the reports predict, maybe I will take advantage of that and dance and play in the rain with them! Because I only get one chance and I want to make it a great one!