my mom is growing up...

Okay guys I had an epiphany the other day. 

I was with my mom. We were having dinner and I started asking questions about her. Mostly about her age, and the things that come with it (lovely). I'm pretty sure men don't read my blog soooo I'm banking that this post won't offend too many :) 

I was about to have my birthday, turning the nasty 34 +1.  I was about to enter a new age bracket. Medically speaking, I have different concerns that I didn't have 11 months ago. IF I was to get pregnant (IIIIIIIIF peeps, NO plans here for that), I would be considered high risk. I now needed to have routine mammograms. Pap smears...what a lovely word, those need to NOT be skipped. Menopause. Yeah. Thats in my not too far off future.  Physically speaking, wrinkle creams are a must.

What about grey hairs? My boobs...besides the fact that they need be smashed in a machine for a pretty picture, they aren't hanging out where they used to.  I had SO many questions to ask my mom, questions she could help me with because one she's my mom! And two, she's my biological example of what MY body COULD do. Her pattern most likely will be mine. I was curious. I was a little nervous. But guys, its my mom, I can ask her ANYTHING. (gosh I love her...even when sometimes she makes me crazy ;)

 So I asked. I asked about it all. When she first has a grey hair. How did she feel we she got pregnant at 36, after not having a baby for 8 years (my parents had NO CLUE they would have a sixth baby at their age). When she started menopause. How does that mammogram REALLY feel. When should I schedule one? Is that something my GYN does for me? Will she ever consider Botox? How low do her blampers REALLY hang? :) hahah! just kidding! I didn't REALLY want to know that answer! 

I expected fully informed answers. She has always been one to have the answers. I was never left hanging. But this time, I felt like her responses to these were short. Almost like she was brushing the questions under the table. I felt like she didn't feel a need to answer the questions. It has been difficult for me to realize I am growing up. And not just growing up...but growing old. I know I'm not OLD. But I am OLDER. And if I am growing older, she must be, too. And I think THATS what was happening in that conversation. I think my sweet beautiful mother was given a really big dose of OLD at that moment. 

As hard as it had been for ME getting used to the idea that I was turning 34+1, SHE hadn't had that realization yet! So these questions I was throwing at her were  probably surprising, maybe even a bit shocking. 

When I went home later I thought about her reactions. I was a little bugged that I didn't get more advice. I called my sister and we chatted. Thats when I thought, Dude. She was just slapped with the "you're getting older" card. And it isn't her birthday. I mean, she and I share my birthday, of course, in a very special way. (another post another day) But my birthday was maybe going to be hard for her, too. 

So as I watched myself turn another year old, I had my mom in my heart and mind. WE are growing up. Together. I have been so lucky to have grown up with her. Each year that I grow, she does too. We have learned together. We have taught each other things along the way. The relationship with my precious mama has been put to the test a few times and we have stuck it out and made it through...together. I couldn't be the person I am today without her. And she wouldn't be who she is partially because of me. 

My mother is such a beautiful soul that has survived more than her wide bright smile would ever let on. To be related to her, to be LIKE her, and to share the rest of my life growing up with her is one of the greatest and blessed things I will ever get to do.